In this case love being a cardboard box with TP for bedding. So cozy! #pet #rats
And we have arrived!
It’s only 11:30 and I’m dead beat tired. It was a really nice drive up and I was purely fueled by the hopes of seeing…and not only was my wish granted but I was met with a very warm reception. A few common interests were shared, which I guess is a good first step. But I’m learning to calm down and pace myself cuz I can feel my mind chomping at the bit to make up lost time for something that has a high potential of going somewhere; either by means of friendship or more.
When my mom and I arrived in Davis this afternoon I must admit my feelings were mixed. Sooooo much of my memory of that place is consumed, influenced, filtered by the friendship I am no longer in that in some ways I came back to a town I never knew. Every street corner, store, road, and view stirred up memories of good and bad that sent me into a giddy yet grieving state of mind. It makes me wonder how much different my time there would have been under different circumstances, and if my present self would have been recognizable or not.
Independence Day
I finally did what friends and family have been telling me to end for a long time now. In this moment I feel sad, giddy, and a little blind. But hopefully I will now be able to gain a firm grasp on the person I was and tie it into the stronger person that I am becoming. 3 years is a long time to be so out of touch with ones self.
Learning fast the hard way…
Today was just about the hardest day I’ve had in a long time. Working retail is not easy, especially for a company that is willing to belly crawl in order to appease the nastiest of customers. “We reserve the right to refuse service to anyone” is quickly becoming a forgotten right (not privilege) to large corporations who only have to deal with customers from on high, and I no longer want any part of it.
It’s beyond my understanding as to why we have such a handful of delightful, considerate, and understanding customers to support our business that my manager and higher ups are willing to debase and sacrifice good employees to continuously bring back people I would never let near my home or family. But that’s corporate America, right? And basic human society now it seems…
But through these past days I’ve realized who my real friends are, who I can depend on, and who I’ll stand by if ever they are in need. I’m also learning not to depend on the needy during my time of need because the same attention and council I give them, I will not receive in return.
